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A Journey from Belief to Atheism: Understanding My Conversion

January 30, 2025Film3342
Why Did You Choose to Become an Atheist? My Journey from Religion to A

Why Did You Choose to Become an Atheist? My Journey from Religion to Atheism

My journey to atheism began in a Catholic environment, where I was raised. Having attended a nun-led kindergarten and a Catholic primary school, I was introduced to a world of logic and reason in subjects like math and Sachkunde (general knowledge). However, religion was a different story. Questions about the events around Jesus' life seemed to lead to even more questions, and it was these queries that ultimately led me to shed my religious beliefs.

Confusing Stories and Questions in Religion

Take, for example, the story of Jesus. According to the tales, Jesus was born, received gifts, and then mysteriously disappeared. He then came back to cause trouble, was crucified, and died for us before rising from the dead and vanishing again. Questions like 'What happens in between?' and 'Why did he stay idle for about 30 years?' puzzled me. Additionally, the concept of a sacrificial death, especially when one can rise from the dead, seemed illogical. Why would one die to save others and then come back, only to be worshipped for that sacrifice?

Lack of Rational Explanation in Faith

The idea of a god, as represented in the Christian narrative, often seems to be one of weakness and human frailty. If Jesus was truly a divine being, why would he wait 30 years before starting his mission? Isn't it more logical for a supreme being to lead the world without delay? Furthermore, why should the sacrifice be so dire that it necessitates rising from the dead? These events, in my view, made religion seem more human-centered rather than god-centered.

Personal Experiences and Confessions

My experiences in school continued to fuel my skepticism about religion. For instance, during my spiritual communion at age nine, the complexity of the confessions made me question the very nature of sin and redemption. Why should a nine-year-old confess? What could an expecting priest teach me, given that I was already a responsible child following the rules? Sadly, the practice of confession made me feel like a sinner, as I felt compelled to lie in the house of God.

Leaving the Church: A Decided Choice

As I matured, my doubts about religion grew stronger. At 14, I refused to partake in the confirmation ceremony, and I continued to attend religion classes until my 13th grade, where I decided to leave school. My purpose in doing this was to understand why people believe and to explore my own feelings. I eventually found that the church's practices, particularly the proselytization, did not align with my values.

Reflections on Belief and Life

Years later, a personal loss related to a diving student brought me back to the church. Sitting in a church filled with people, I had a humbling experience. It made me realize that without a belief in a higher purpose, life can feel meaningless. However, I also understood that my perspective changed. I no longer pray or kneel; I stand and use my hands to act. The realization that death is a natural end to life makes me value every moment.

Conclusion

My journey to atheism has been a complex one, filled with questions and personal experiences. It's taken me from a place of faith to a place of disbelief, but it has also taught me to value life and to act with purpose. While religion offers comfort and a sense of community, for me, the belief in a god or gods is no longer a rational conclusion. Instead, I find my purpose in the here and now, cherishing every moment and every life, like that of the young boy I remembered.